Now more than ever, it seems like we are a people divided
And it just won’t do—no more, I say! According to a Pew Research Center study from June 2016, forty-seven percent of people who’d intended on voting for Hillary Clinton had no close friends backing Trump. On the other side, thirty-one percent of Trump supporters had no Clinton supporters in their network of relationships. Partisanship isn’t good for the country, and it seems to be even worse for the dating scene.
I’m suggesting that we bridge this expansive gulf doing what we do best: sex!
Well, sex and a healthy dose of love and understanding.
You’ve probably found yourself in a situation much like this: you’re on a date, gazing into the eyes of a prospective lover, utterly certain that you’ve finally found someone who’s compatible with you, only to hear them steering the conversation to politics. That’s when it dawns on you… she doesn’t share the exact same opinions as you do *gasp*. That’s when you pull the rip cord. That’s when you make a ‘yuge‘ error.
There are dating services that seek to heal this political divide, like trumpsingles.com, for instance, which boasts that it’ll “Make Dating Great Again!” by offering its users a dating platform catering specifically to Trump supporters. The problem, in my mind, is that a site like this only serves to further separate people of differing views, isolating them from one another, definitely not improving the dating scene. That’s why I’m a big advocate of being open to dating people with different political points of view.
Here’s how to date inter-politically, the right way.
Don’t Panic; Remain Calm
Impulse number one when your date reveals herself to be on the other side of the political spectrum is to freak out. I know this, trust me. First, you’ll be appalled, maybe even a little bit disgusted to find yourself sharing a civilized meal with someone who doesn’t share your politics. After the initial horror passes, and it will very quickly, chances are you’ll take to filibustering. You’ll argue, heatedly no doubt, about the social issues of the day and turn a potential amorous relationship into one that’s adversarial.
It doesn’t have to be that way, though. Take a deep breath, nod your head, forget about microaggressions, and go outside for some fresh air to level yourself out. If you feel absolutely compelled to ejaculate your own political preferences, go for it, but be respectful, and remember: don’t confuse someone’s political values with their core values. We aren’t who we vote for. If you can both maintain decent conversation, in spite of your differences, you might be a pretty damn fine match.
Think of it as a litmus test, and remember: just because you’re dating a republican, democrat, conservative, or liberal doesn’t mean that you’re one too. We’re all entitled to our own politics; that’s one of the joys of living in a free country, and like they always say: “variety is the spice of life.”
Communication Is Key
Talk it out, seriously. You don’t have to convert your beloved (and you shouldn’t proselytize, either; it’s annoying!), but you can get a sense of where they’re coming from and vice versa. As repulsed as you are about her political affiliations, I can guarantee you she feels the same way about yours. Learning about another position, practicing empathy instead of blind ignorance, is not only a generous thing to do, but it helps you to better understand where you’re coming from. Who knows, by being open and communicating a little bit better, we might close that seemingly impossible gap that separates us. We might heal America. At the very least, agree to disagree. We do it with our loved ones every day, so why not here as well?
Here’s what it boils down to
It’s difficult enough discovering a person who treats you right, who you’re attracted to, and who you actually enjoy spending time with, so why cut that person off just because you have political differences? You don’t, obviously. That would be a big mistake.