Stop Confusing Porn with Sex Education

Don't expect to be pile-driving from the get-go.

Porn is a great outlet for singles and couples alike. It’s a nice way to get in the mood and explore your sexual, erotic, kinky fantasies. However, more and more, young men and women are confusing porn with sex education. Understand that porn is fantasy and meant for you to enjoy the same way you would other forms of fiction. It can help you open up to your partner about what turns you on and can increase communication and intimacy, but it’s not meant for you to use it as a substitute for sex education – more as a complement to it.

9284_bex_peta_jensen (3)-min (1)
Photo – Brazzers (My Honey Wants It Rough)

Unnecessary Pressure

Using porn as a substitution for sex education can warp the expectations you have of your partner. For example, many porn scenes feature anal sex, which looks fantastic on camera – it’s an acquired preference. But, you may get the perception that every couple is out there having anal sex and start to pressure your partner with this expectation. A study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine in 2010, found that in reality, only 4 percent of American adults ages 18 to 59 report regularly engaging in anal sex. So, it’s important to distinguish fantasy from reality. If you’re interested in exploring anal sex, or something else you see in porn, don’t pressure your partner into emulating the porn. Give her time to get comfortable with the idea and she may be open to trying new things :).

9517_btaw_august_ames (3)-min
Photo – Brazzers (Confidential Informant)

Perceptions of Performance

You might think male porn stars have it easy. Just “get it up and go for it” right? Wrong. Male performers have a tough job. They’re expected to get it up on command, maintain an erection throughout the scene (which lasts a few hours with breaks) and give the perfect ‘pop shot’ when the time is right. If you use porn in place of sex education, you’re likely to compare your performance to that of the male talent you see in videos, and subsequently feel as though you’re falling short.

Know this, male porn stars are professionals and their job isn’t easy – although they make it look that way. No matter how much a guy thinks he loves sex, he’s usually in for a rude awakening when he tries to make it as a male porn star. That’s why there are fewer male porn stars than females, most guys simply don’t make the cut. Leave it to the pros, don’t feel as though your performance in the bedroom has to match that of the male talent you see on-screen.

9613_zzs_abelle_cassidy (1)-min
Photo – Brazzers (Yoga Freaks: Episode Four)

Unrealistic Ideas about Positions

In many ways, porn is an art form. From the locations, to the wardrobe, every aspect is carefully chosen to deliver the most visually appealing aesthetic to express and simulate pure bliss, desire, and fantasy. This also means that some positions you see on-screen are purely for the enjoyment of the viewer and not necessarily a reflection of the positions you should expect from your partner. Positions such as the ‘pile-driver’ (where the female performer is inverted and the male performer squats over her) look great on camera but are not super realistic for passionate bedroom love-making. This is yet another reason why you shouldn’t confuse porn for sex education.

So, enjoy porn for the entertainment that it is meant to be and escape into fantasy, but don’t expect to be pile-driving when you beginning having sex!

Written by Nikki Benz

Life lesson provider, Pomeranian lover, and Adult Industry specialist. Don of the #BenzMafia.